[Random Quotes] |
Life sucks... then you die
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It's better to be male cus your friends can be trusted never to trap you with "So, notice anything different?"
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Don't let the birds of paradise pee on yer breakfast
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I'm only a novice in life...
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It is illegal to have sex with a live fish in Texas
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If teflon doesn't stick to anything, how do they make it stick to the pan?
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Life's a bitch... then you marry one
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"Over 75% of our imports come from abroad" - President Bush
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If fate hands you a lemon - make lemonade
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New divorced Barbie - comes with Kens car, Kens house...
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Women are like pianos... upright or grand
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I feel like a cheeseboard without cheese
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I feel like a jug without milk
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Life does not compute
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I'm a bomb technician - if you see me running, try and keep up
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Whose idea was it to make dyslexia such a hard word to spell?
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What a clever idea... putting an 's' in 'lisp'
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It's amazing the people you meet when you haven't got your gun
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Is life insurance higher for a bomb disposal expert?
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Rule 1 in the countryside - Never use a hedgehog to whipe your bum!
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Rule 2 in the countryside - Never play leapfrog with a unicorn
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All upgrading my computer has done is enabled it to crash faster
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I was told to take life by the scruff of the neck - I think I strangled it
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I'm not living - I'm just killing time
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Men are like mascara - they run at the first sign of emotion
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On the other hand, there are fingers
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On the other hand, the early worm gets eaten
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Two fish sitting in a tank, one says "how do you drive this thing?"
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