[Blonde question jokes] |
How can you tell if there has been another blonde using the computer?
There's writing on the tippex.
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What's the difference between a blonde and a shopping trolley?
A shopping trolley has a mind of it's own.
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What's the difference between an intelligent blonde and the Loch Ness Monster?
The Loch Ness Monster has been sighted.
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What do you call a blonde with brain cell?
Gifted.
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What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells?
Pregnant.
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How do blonde brain cells die?
Alone.
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What do you call it when a blonde dies her hair brunette?
Artificial Intelligence.
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Why do blondes always put their hair up?
To catch what goes over her head.
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Why is it good to have a blonde as a passenger?
You can park in the handicap zone.
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How do you make a blondes eyes light up?
Shine a torch in her ear.
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What do UFO's and smart blondes have in common?
You keep hearing about them, but never see any.
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What do you get when you offer a blonde a penny for her thoughts?
Change.
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Why don't blondes eat jello?
They can't figure out how to get five cups of water into the little packets.
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A man gets into a lift and there's a tenner on the floor. In the lift with him is Santa Clause, an intelligent blonde and the tooth fairy. Who picks up the tenner?
The man, the others don't exist.
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Why don't blondes like Kool Aid?
Because they can't fit 5 cups of water in the little envelope.
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How do you keep your blonde secretary busy?
Give her a packet of M&Ms, and tell her to put them in alphabetical order.
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What do you call nine blondes standing in a circle?
A dope ring.
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What do you call a basement full of blondes?
A whine cellar.
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What do you call 10 blondes standing ear to ear?
A wind tunnel.
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Why can't blondes make ice cubes?
They can't remember the recipe.
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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory?
She kept throwing out the W's.
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Why did the blonde get excited when she finished her jigsaw in 6 months?
Because on the box it said 2-4 years.
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What do you call a fly buzzing around inside a blondes head?
A space invader.
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What do you see when you look into a blondes eyes?
The back of her scull.
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Why do blondes drive BMWs?
They can't spell Porsche.
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Did you hear about the blonde who stayed up all night to find out where the sun went?
It finally dawned on her.
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Why didn't the blonde go to Disneyland?
Because on the sign it said "Disneyland Left."
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Why do blondes have TGIF on their T-Shirts?
This Goes In Front.
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Why do blondes have TGIF on their shoes?
Toes Go In First.
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Hear about the blonde who brought an AM radio?
It took her a month to realise she could play it at night.
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What did the blonde say when she saw the sign out side YMCA?
"Look, they spelt MACY wrong."
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Why did the blonde climb over the glass wall?
To see what was on the other side.
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Why do blondes like lightning?
Because they think some one is taking their picture.
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How do you make a blonde laugh on Saturday?
Tell her a joke on Wednesday.
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Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice?
Because it said 'Concentrate'.
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What do you do if a blonde chucks a grenade at you?
Take the pin out and throw it back.
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What do you do if a blonde chucks a pin at you?
Run, she's got a grenade in her hand.
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How did the blonde break her leg while collecting leaves?
Fell out the tree.
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How many blondes does it take to make some chocolate cookies?
Eleven - One to make the mixture, ten to shell the smarties.
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